Sunday, July 26, 2015

Is gay romance about to disappear? #MM #GayRom

OMG, gay romance is dead!

I've seen this discussion in several places and to be honest, can't believe anyone is taking it seriously. I love the optimism that anti-gay hatred is about to be a thing of the past, but let's be realistic. That's not going to happen.

Do you want to know how big an impact marriage equality will have on the plight of the gay community we write about? Look at Toronto. The gay capital of Canada. Host to World Pride. The shining example of equality in North America with over ten years of legalized same-sex marriage.

It's the ideal city, right? Look a little closer.

Until this year, they had a bigot for Mayor, who refused to attend Gay Pride. He would purposely plan family vacations out of town to create a convenient excuse to miss it. The year he didn't do so led to his public admission that he doesn't like gay people and doesn't want to have to deal with a parade in their honor. He even refused to participate in World Pride and led a protest to remove the rainbow flag from city hall.

Toronto also has an unresolved issue with homeless LGBT kids. They have similar statistics to major cities in the U.S. More than 30% of their homeless teens are LGBT, on the street because their families can't deal with their sexuality or gender identity.

Yes, Canada, our usually level-headed neighbors to the north who jumped this equality hurdle ten years ago.

They have anti-gay hate crimes and poverty and sex trafficking of young LGBTs. 

In other words, they still look a lot like the US in some important ways. This is why activists keep saying don't take your foot off the gas. Laws don't change attitudes overnight. We're still fighting for blacks rights and women's rights and those laws passed a long time ago.

For M/M authors who only write about the sorrow of relationships that can never be legal, yes. I'm sure they'll have issues selling that plot, but that doesn't mean the genre is dying. It just means some people are out of touch with the reason readers like gay romance. The angst inspired by discrimination isn't what leads people to coo over adorable gay couples online. It's not why the gay porn industry has such a tremendous following of female fans. It's something else and as long as M/M authors continue to tap into that, books will sell because that same-sex dynamic strikes a chord with readers. It's a unique pairing they can't find in any other genre and that's why they're snatching stories off the shelves as fast as we can write them.

We of all people should know better than to ask what to write now that marriage equality is no longer an issue. Even if someone waved a wand and the anti-gay sentiment evaporated overnight, there would still be stories to write because gay men have the same struggles with relationships as everyone else. How do you find a good guy among a sea of people who only want to hook up? How do you find Mr. Wonderful when you live in a small town and can't afford to run off to college? Once you find the guy you want to settle down with, how do you deal with psychotic in-laws? What happens when the passion dies? What happens when you suspect your perfect guy is having an emotional affair with someone online? What do you do when your guy's ex-boyfriend/ex-husband comes back to town and you're terrified it will lead to something?

Romance is romance. It's all the same craziness because it's all the same love.

Write on, people! This isn't the end. It's the start of a new book in the series.

Have you heard?
Book one in the Saving Liam Series is FREE.
FREE, I tell ya!


  1. Awesome post! I totally agree. Love stories don't magically change because the nightly news begins reporting on a new issue. ;) Entangled relationships will continue to fuel the romance genre for centuries to come.

    1. So true! Where there is romance there is drama. =) Thanks for the comment.

  2. Great post, DP. No one is saying that het romance will disappear because straight marriage is legal. I don't know why they'd think that of gay romance. :) The process of two people coming together to form a couple and make a lifetime commitment is full of drama, and social issues play just a small part in that.

    1. Right? I think there are people who assume marriage equality will automatically topple all other aspects of inequality. It's a lovely thought, but...nope. Not gonna happen.

      Great to hear from you, Andrea!